Ten Bookworm Quirks

'Lo,

People who like to read are interesting people. They've gone on tons of adventures, met millions of people (and creatures), and lived too many lives to count.
Here are just a few of the things your resident bookworm might do. 

Note: These are all things I do, but they might not apply to everyone. You can comment below if you relate to any of these things, or have any queer bookish habits of your own!


 


Walking While Reading

You just came from the library. The first page was absolutely gripping! Who could tear their eyes away from the glorious page to glance down the mundane aisles of the grocery story?!?! This is where peripheral vision and super senses come in, friends. 
Another Note: Kathryn was once a stupid seven year old and had not honed her walking-while-reading skills yet. She foolishly walked into an alley and had a narrow escape with a car. This walking-while-reading practise is advised with the utmost caution and wise discretion.

Mourning Fictional Deaths

Next time you see your resident bookworm feelings rather glum after finishing a book, give him space, perhaps a cup of hot chocolate. He will most likely suffer long term effects, but the best way to  decrease the pain is to distract him with another book. Cookbooks are very distracting. The trouble with these, though, is that they make you very hungry.

Smelling Books

Bookworms are very concerned about how their literature smells. Now, if you read on a Kindle, you'll probably just smell plastic and Styrofoam, but if you get books from your cousin's boyfriend's sister or a thrift shop or a school book fair, you'll get some unique smells. Usually a delightful paper smell (I like the kind that smells like construction paper), but sometimes something unusual. One time I got a book that smelled like puke. One time I got a book that smelt like an expensive urban store. You never know. 

Feeling Books

Books should feel nice in your hand. If you are searching for a good read, make sure the texture of the cover is perfect, the pages un-scratchy, the sound of turning pages golden music, and the durability of the book impeccable. You never know what sort of dire situation you could get stuck in.

Tip: If you are ever trapped in the wilderness, you can use your book (which hopefully is thick) to build a fire, ward off insanity, and fend off wild animals. While mistreating a book as such is a horror to think about, buying another copy sounds slightly better than getting eaten alive.

Author Aspirations

Many a bookworm has experienced the urge to inspire other bookworms. They have carefully studied the styles of their favorite authors, experimented with characters, observed people creepily for "research!" etc. They may not be published now, but of course in ten years you'll be lining up with your dandy copy of whatever-they-wrote waiting to be signed.

Turning into a Geek-Nerd-Thing*

If your resident bookworm has decided he likes something, he will most likely purchase tons of merchandise to exhibit his like, as well as spew off bookish fumes. Please do not be embarrassed if he chooses to wear his Harry Potter scarf in public, has a Mr. Darcy quote for every occasion, and loves to screech "For Narnia!" whenever he does something awesome. 

*watch your bookworm carefully. When a bookworm enters this phase, he has a chance of becoming Gollum. This is not desirable. 

Getting Offended...Easily

"so why did Bob murder Jerry last week?"
"...they say Jerry made fun of Bob's favorite character."
"ah."

Audiobooks Over Music

Some people listen to music when they work out. A bookworm may choose to listen to an audiobook.
Some people listen to music when they clean the house. A bookworm may choose to listen to an audiobook.
You get the idea.

"THIS WAS NOT IN THE BOOK?!?!"

Watching a movie that does not exhibit the glory of your favorite book, and that misleads commoners who have not experienced the book, is a painful experience for a bookworm. Please sympathize with him and offer to help him write a few angry letters to the producers.

Wanting to Share Bookish Joy with the World

Instead of #selfies, it's #shelfies. Instead of status updates about who-got-married-to-who or new-buys-from-Buymart, it's the newest finds at the bookstore you drove two hours to get to.
#roadtrip

~

~ K A T H R Y N













17 comments:

  1. "*watch your bookworm carefully. When a bookwork enters this phase, he has a chance of becoming Gollum. This is not desirable." LOL. This line is fantastic.

    Hi Kathryn! I just saw that you had followed my blog sometime ago, and I apologize for not stopping by sooner - I thought I had already returned your follow! Whoops.

    This was a great post. I consider myself a mild bookworm; I don't get to new books often, and I take forever reading them when I do. But I love them. The smells, the worlds, the creatures and people. ..And I totally agree with your point about movies VS books. That can be.. interesting.

    Thank you again for your follow. You have an absolutely gorgeous blog!

    Eve
    Edge of Night

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    1. Thanks for commenting, Eve!
      ~Kathryn

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  2. This is DEFINITELY TRUE!!

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    1. Haha, glad I'm not the only one who experiences these traumas. XD
      ~Kathryn

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  3. Replies
    1. Thanks, Nabila!
      ~Kathryn

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  4. Loved this post! It is so accurate! Also, You've been tagged for the Rising Authors Tag. thedepthogmyfaith.wordpress.com

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    1. Thanks, Allie! I'll get that up early next week.
      ~Kathryn

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  5. 'Ello there Kathryn! This post has been the best thing I've read all day! (And believe me, I've been reading!)
    Walking while reading!!! In all honesty, my family used to have a rule specifically against that, but now it is just: 'If you run into something or someone while walking and reading, it is your fault alone.' :)
    Mourning fictional deaths... sniff sniff. Moment of silence... 'I know, my heart!' ~Edmund Sparkler, Little Dorrit. I wish someone had thought to give me hot chocolate before!!! Oh the pain!! :)
    Smelling... Oh my g-o-s-h! I KNOW what you mean! I do that all the time. And feeling?! EVERY. TIME.
    Author Aspirations? Can't say I've ever done that, but ready... set... now I do.
    Geek-Nerd-Thing? WHAT? I would NEVER be such a thing as you have said I would have... um... okay fine... I am. You know what? I am proud of it! For Narniaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!! XD
    So, there's this meme that I can't find, but it says something to the effect of:
    (Picture of a girl) Girl: I think Lord of the Rings is so dumb. (The picture goes to two guys, both scowling)
    One dude: Can I shoot her?
    Other: Not in public
    That is what I feel when people say they don't like my characters. Don't worry, I have only killed... um... 14. (Jk)
    Audiobooks over music? Um... yes please?! Any and every day.
    OH MY GOSH!!!!! I GET SO MAD WHEN THEY BUTCHER BOOKS! AAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! THOSE HORRIBLE TERRIBLE EVIL DISGUSTING EXCRUCIATINGLY PAINFUL THINGS. LEAVING US TO WALLOW IN FRIEKISH MISERY FOREVER!... what's another word? There aren't enough words in my vocabulary (that I can think of at the moment) or even in the dictionary to describe the hideousness of those wicked beasts.
    Too little of the world know of the wonders of books. Of the joy of bookish splendor... sigh. Gee, I hope you don't mind is ridiculously long comment. Sorry!
    ~E
    AKA Your Friend in the Yellow Shirt

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    1. Thank you so much, Esther! And I love reading long comments-I really like your enthusiasm. :)
      ~Kathryn

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    2. Oh, I forgot
      scribblingpencils.blogspot.com
      And, I want you to know that I too am a Roman Catholic! I almost couldn't believe it when I read that you were one too! I know waaaay too little Catholic girls my age. (I'm 15)
      ~E
      AKA Your Friend in the Yellow Shirt (who coincidentally doesn't own a single article of clothing consisting of that color)

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    3. You're Roman Catholic? So am I! Sorry to butt in... I just saw that and... I'mma go die in a hole........
      -Dani

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    4. That's totally okay, Dani!! I LOVE meeting other Catholics!!

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    5. Haha I'm Catholic too!! ;) How neat to see other Catholics in the blogging world! :)

      Grace
      golden halcyon

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  6. I can totally relate to all of these! Loving this post. <3 <3

    Sophia xx
    A Lantern In Her Hand
    The Inkpot Girl

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  7. Haha getting offended - totally ;)

    Grace
    golden halcyon

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  8. I. LOVE. THIS. PERIOD.
    No but seriously.
    I feel so old at times when i finish a book. like i have just lived all the lives of all the people and am old now.

    Also being a musician (and sometimes touring) i can't rightly say audiobooks over music (as music is such an essential part of my life and work), but goodness gracious they are good for long travels!

    -Abigail
    ( sweetergetsthejourneyblog.blogspot.com )

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for leaving a comment-you're the best!
~Kathryn

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